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The Psychology of Lying
BY: Staff Writer Michael Terzian
Why do people lie? Lying is a behavior whose roots are
more complex than we imagine. This article will briefly explore some of the
manifold causes of lying. Deliberate deception often finds its way into the
lives of nearly everyone. Deception, in fact, is regarded as endemic to all
creatures. Even animals, you may be surprised to discover, use deception.
One interesting occasion of lying among animals occurred with the gorilla,
"Koko." This gorilla, after several years of tutelage by a master trainer,
learned the basic elements of sign language. After acquiring the ability to
communicate with humans, something interesting happened. One day, Koko´s
residence was equipped with a new sink and faucet. At this time, Koko was
looked after by a trainer´s aide. After the faucet was installed, Koko
broke it. Everybody knew she broke it. The trainer´s aide was simply not
strong enough to break it. Regardless of this fact, Koko signed that her
trainer´s aide broke it. In this way, Koko used her new-founded powers of
language to lie. She also tried to pass the blame to the third party. Since
no one taught Koko how to lie, we can say, with some degree of assurance,
that deception is found even within animals.
The existence of deception among animals is documented. In the "Dance of
Deception," Dr. Harriet Goldhor Lerner describes how a chimp deceived her
fellow chimps: "A chimp misdirects her group away from a food source, covers
up her own movements so that the location of the food can´t be traced, and
returns later to dine by herself." (pp. 11-12). This example clearly adds
credence to the idea that deception is something found among animals. Once
we realize that animals can lie, we become aware that animals are more clever
than we would like to believe. Lying is not limited to homo sapiens. Humans,
however, are more sophisticated deceivers. We all have the capacity, if not
always the inclination, to lie. But what motivates us to lie?
During the Monica Lewinsky scandal, President Clinton took lying to new
heights, or, should we say, depths. His first response to accusations of
illicit relations, on major network television, we may all remember was,
"I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky." Months
later, also on major network television, he admitted his fault, "Indeed I
did have an improper relationship with Miss Lewinsky." His confession,
however, lacked the sincerity which would have given it wider acceptance.
Beyond that, he pretty much held onto his deceitful ways. He came across
as somewhat evasive and dodging. Here we see a man, vested with perhaps
the most power in the world, abuse it by deliberately misleading an entire
nation. So we see that even in a position that was once thought to be
dignified and honorable, deceit rears its ugly head. Lying is actually a
politician´s tool. But what about lying at our level, the average, everyday
people?
As children, many of us can remember doing something wrong and then getting
caught. Once caught, we often lied to cover up the behavior that went amiss.
Various techniques are used for this. If we had siblings, for instance, we
often blamed them for our own misconduct. We said to our parents, "he made
me do it," or, "she made me do it." Fear of punishment, then, is the primary
motive for lying. We knew that what we did deserved a spanking. In order to
find a way out of the punishment, we told a fib. This type of lying is outside
the bounds of justifiable behavior, simply because it attempts to release a
person from responsibility for their own actions. Much like Bill Clinton´s
case, this lie is used to "put distance" between the misbehavior and its
perpetrator. Then, by blurring the origin of the lie, its status as "lie"
can not be detected. It is as old as time itself: When God discovered that
Adam and Eve ate the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, Adam,
out of fear of punishment, replied, "The woman gave me some fruit, so I ate
it." This response, indirectly, is the exact same response as children. Like
Adam and Eve and Koko, children pass the blame to others instead.
Consequently, shifting the blame requires the issue of a lie; the two cannot
be separated.
But there are many other motives for lying. Self-preservation, or even
survival, can depend on a lie. Take the man who cheats on his wife and
later denies it. This type of lying is told as a means to preserve his
family and himself. That is, if he were to admit to his wife and family
that he had an affair, he would risk suffering the break-up of his marriage
and family itself. By using lies to explain away this behavior, which,
actually, points toward dissatisfaction with his marriage, the real problem
escapes notice; namely, adultery. Is this what happened with Bill Clinton?
Was he trying to protect his wife and daughter from undue embarrassment and
emotional harm? It is doubtful. There is a stronger likelihood that Bill
Clinton was seriously worried about his place in the annals of history,
rather than the well-being of Hillary and Chelsea. Despicable as it sounds,
Clinton´s lies were more than likely used to preserve himself and his public
standing. In this way, Clinton survived the accusations by means of a lie.
Self-preservation was Clinton´s motive for lying.
The survivalist´s lie, then, can have some value. But in the long run, these
lies are eventually exposed. The fact is, lies have a tendency to compensate
themselves; this is called the "snowball effect." In other words, once a lie
is told, others soon follow to justify the previous ones, and so on, and so
on.... Lying for survival will ultimately fail, and lying only serves to
make matters worse. In Clinton´s case, self preservation, or even just
"saving face," gave the lie its value. But his lie, despite its apparent
value, still cannot be sanctioned.
The third motive for lying is to compensate for something called
"survival anxiety." Goldhor-Lerner brings this to our attention. When
parents lie to protect their children from information they would not be
able to handle, the results bob to the surface: "When children sense
information is being withheld, they become confused and anxious, lose
their sense of trust, and often end up blaming themselves. In searching
for a way to explain the inexplicable, they create private beliefs, myths,
and fantasies." Goldhor-Lerner, page 142. This example suggests that
children may craft lies as a way to relieve anxiety. They do this because
they have no other way of coping with the upsurgence of confusion in their
psyche..The lie they absorb acts as a burr that "beats up" on the children,
by clouding their understanding. Then, in turn, they create their own lies.
So we begin to see with these examples, that whatever the undergirding of a
lie is, it inevitably leaves a wake of destruction in its path.
Lies as acts of aggression is the fourth motive I found for lying. Some
psychologists´ findings delineate that lies are told for the purpose of
deliberately injuring another person: "Bursten (1972) described this as
achieving a feeling of superiority by ´putting something over´ on another
person. Thus, lies can be conceived as a form of verbal aggression or
sadism." The Psychology of Deceit, Charles V. Ford, M.D., pp. 89-90. When
lies are told for this reason, mutual respect for the general welfare of
persons is lost. A lie, once discovered as such by the recipient, gives
the impression that he or she´s rights have been trampled on. And to make
matters worse, these type of lies do not always yield to analysis. They
can be perpetrated under the guise of innocence and still create the harm
that is desired. The fact is, a recipient of a lie is being treated as
less than human. The lie becomes a source of denigration, which ultimately
violates their inalienable right to the truth. Further still, the lie casts
a cloud over their perception of matters. In this way, lies can also be seen
as sources of confusion. They disrupt the equilibrium of everyday affairs.
Lies as acts of aggression, are like intellectual terrorism.
Lies are also told as a way to create a haven of fantasy. This can be
categorized under the title, "lies as wish fulfillment." This type of lie
is very common in children of the ages 4-7 years. Children often confuse
a wish with reality. They believe that if a fantasy is spoken out loud, it
will come true. This idea, then, can give rise to all kinds of falsehood.
Among some of these false notions would be such ideas as "My daddy is a
king and I live in a castle," or "Puff the Magic Dragon visited me last
night in my bedroom." The fact is, neither of these are true, but the mere
mention of them, the child believes, will bring it to pass. As we get older,
of course, this type of thinking gradually erodes. The overspreading of ideas
does not guarantee their becoming reality, nor is this process believed or
enacted with advancing years.
And then there is the manipulative lie. This lie can be a part of the inner
self straight through adulthood. Adults sometimes hold onto the manipulative
lie because they have found that it is useful. They discover that it can often
serve to reach their own ends and grow a liking towards it. People sheltering
the manipulative lie find it a very convenient way of structuring their
associations with others. They recognize that lying can paint an impressive
picture of themselves with minimal effort expended. By crafting lies about
themselves, they can create an identity that is in tune with their private
beliefs of who they are. For example, a person who plays a sport at the
amateur level, but believes that he plays with professional expertise, may
say, "Next year I´ll be drafted into the pros," or, "I used to play at the
professional level." These carefully crafted misrepresentations of themselves,
or their ability, are often mixed with an element of truth, although not
completely true. As such, these type of lies are very persuasive.
Next in the series of motives for lying is the lie to maintain self-esteem.
"People with low self-esteem often experience a sense of failure...in an
effort to regulate self-esteem, the individual may use prevarication in an
attempt to close the gap between reality and their grandiose demands." The
Psychology of Deceit, Charles V. Ford, M.D., pp. 99-100. In this case lying
is used to cover up a personal inadequacy. In other words, when talents are
not there but may be required, lying is used as a substitute to the missing
aptitude. For some people, their expectations for themselves are so high
(grandiose demands), that they cannot meet them any other way than to lie.
For example, a person may believe that he will, or must, win the Nobel
Prize, although this achievement is far beyond his or her scope. This is
what is called a grandiose demand. It is the belief in an accomplishment
that, for all intents and purposes, is highly unlikely to be achieved. It
is valid to conclude, then, that for those who suffer from grandiose demands,
lying patches the void their inadequacies create. Or, lying allows them to
"reach up" for something that they have no other way to attain. These people
"walk" with lies by making them their companions. Their image--in their own
conception--is enhanced by the lie, which thereby elevates their self-esteem.
In this way, lying acts as sutures to a conscience torn by inadequacy.
One of the more intriguing bits of information I came across while
researching this article is the influence of hereditary on lying. Is lying
in our genes? And if it is, why do some people lie more than others? And,
why are some more successful with this tactic? This may seem to be a paradox,
because how can something that is thought to be directly controlled by moral
and ethical decision, have a genetic basis? What is the relationship, in this
case, between science and behavior? There is some evidence for the notion of
lying as having a genetic basis: "Rowe (1986) investigated several potential
causes of delinquency and found that general environmental factors, such as
social class or child-rearing styles, were not influential. Significant
factors did include the intrafamily environment and genetics."
(The Psychology of Deceit, Charles V. Ford, M.D. pp. 65-66).
From this information we can glean two significant facts. One, since
delinquency was not correlated with social class or child-rearing, the
conclusion can be drawn that there are other factors at work. Are these
factors genetic? Is delinquency, if not a result of environment, a result
of hereditary influence? Maybe so. And, since delinquency can be a carrier
for deceit, or lying, then it follows that lying may have a genetic component
to it also. In other words, if delinquency is correlated to genes and lying
is a part of delinquency, then, by logic, lying and genes might be correlated
too. Nevertheless, some people may find it very disturbing that genes can
play a role in lying. This could quite possibly lead to the awful conclusion
that those who lie persistently are doing so at the beck and call of the
double helix! Such knowledge is deep, very grave, and frightening. It
suggests that we are no more than puppets on a genetic string.
Finally, we should take a look at the language of lying. Several researchers
have found, surprisingly, that our language itself tends to favor lying:
The English language has many terms and euphemisms to describe lying.
Karpman commented that the number of synonyms for "truth" is small,
but those related to lying might fill several pages in a dictionary. Shibles
(1985) noted that a rich vocabulary of deceit is not unique to English
and provided a long list of German words descriptive of lying. The
Psychology of Deceit, Charles V. Ford, M.D., pp.24-25
From this it appears that the very language itself supports the act of lying.
The total number of words related to lying exceeds at least three hundred!
Perhaps the growth of the vocabulary of lying is a result of the human
tendency to do so. Since all humans sometimes lie on occasion, rather
than tell the truth, the very language itself might accommodate this
behavior. Under this view, the terms used to connote lying could actually
grow within the language, much like weeds sprout up on a lawn of green
grass. A language that grows from lying, then, can enhance the habit´s
survival, since it becomes all too easy to construct a lie. The degree
of difficulty for lying is eased by the rich vocabulary that supports it.
Consider this, too. A language that supports lying can breed what are
called "master liars." During the Monica Lewinsky scandal, Bill Clinton
demonstrated this tendency. His language utilized the vocabulary of lying,
to serve his purposes. Yet another memorable utterance, under oath, was
Clinton´s response, "It depends what "is" is." It follows then, that with
mastery of the English language, or any language for that matter, one can
gain mastery of lying, should the person have a mind for it. Clinton, I
think, simply made the most of his education, intelligence, and wit, to
deceive. He is a person very adept at the use of the vocabulary of lying,
and very concerned with his public image. This concern is largely prevalent
among politicians, so it can be passed over without much ado. They must have
this concern, simply to win re-election, stay in office, and ultimately,
perpetuate their views in political thought. Perhaps the best precaution I
could make for "master liars" is that they stay away from perjuring
themselves. Time will tell if this is, indeed, what happened with President
Clinton.
Thus, it appears that lying is a practice that all have recourse to, and
it´s sad to say that a lie is never very far from leaving our mouths. When
faced with a difficult situation, some people may resort to lying. There
really is no complete and total method of washing lying out of our
mentality, but with a resolution to do so as minimally as possible,
perhaps the battle against falsehood can be won. But, more often than not,
we treat our own lying in a glib way. We are more likely to pass over our
small, petty lies, since to do this gives us peace of mind. It´s the big
lies that leave a mark on our conscience. Fear of punishment, compensation
against survival anxiety, aggression, fantasy fulfillment, manipulation,
building self-esteem, and finally, genetics, are all established motives
for lying. With a wealth of reasons for lying, it´s hard to avoid it
altogether. Why fall prey to lying? Because we are human.
References:
1. The Dance of Deception, Harriet Goldhor-Lerner, Ph.d.
2. The Psychology of Deceit, Charles V. Ford, M.D.
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